John Bolton vows not to shave moustache

Legendary nutcase John Bolton, said to have been denied a cabinet position in the Trump administration due to the president-elect’s dislike of moustaches, has vowed not to shave his off.

“I appreciate the grooming advice from the totally unbiased mainstream media, but I will not be shaving my #mustache,” he wrote on Twitter, hashtagging the reference to his Nietzschean schnozz brush.

The Hill elaborates on Trump’s preference for men who look a certain way.

Trump’s aides have accepted he may rule out candidates who do not satisfy his image of what a particular nominee for a role should look like, according to The Washington Post.

“That’s the language he speaks,” said a source familiar with the Trump transition team’s internal deliberations. “He’s very aesthetic. You can come with somebody who is very much qualified for the job, but if they don’t look the part, they’re not going anywhere.”

Bolton’s keeping his moustache is actually quite badass, especially if he was asked to lose it to be considered for a job.

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